Sunday, September 27, 2015

September 26, 2015 - Clagary

Location: Dickens Pub
Episodes: Homie the Clown, A Star is Burns, The PTA Disbands!
Categories: Professor Frink, Monkeys and Apes
Winner: A Sex Farm for Sex Hookers!

1. A Sex Farm for Sex Hookers!, 41.5 pts
2. This Team Has Switched to the Vita-peach Health Log and May Not Have the Mega Nutrients to Stave Off Death, 41 pts
3. I Can’t Believe I Ate the Whole Thing, 38 pts
4. I Don’t Know Why, It’s a Perfectly Cromulent Team Name, 37 pts
5. The Moe S├┐zlak Experience feat. Homer, 36 pts
6. The Maggaggies, 35.5 pts
7. Smashy! Smahy!, 35 pts
8. The Noodle Armed Choir Boys, 34 pts
9. The Chimpan-As [to Chimpanzees], 32 pts
9. Stupid Sexy Flanders, 32 pts
11. Mein Bratwurst Has a First Name It’s F-R-I-T-Z, Mein Bratwurst Has a Second Name It’s S-C-H-N-A-C-K-E-N-P-F-E-F-F-E-R-H-A-U-S-E-N, 27.5 pts
12. Super Nintendo Chalmers, 26 pts
13. I’m a Stupid Moron with an Ugly Face and a Big Butt and My Butt Smells and I Like to Kiss My Own Butt, 23 pts
14. Police Chief Quizzims, 22.5 pts
15. The I’m On-A-Rolla Gays, 22 pts
16. Hooray for Everything!!!, 21 pts
17. Puck Slapping Maple Suckers, 13 pts
18. Pray for Mojo, 7 pts

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

September 21, 2015 - Chicago

Location: Pizzeria Serio
Categories: Kirk van Houten, It Stinks!
Episodes: Brush with Greatness, Homer Defined, A Streetcar Named Marge
Winners: A Case of the S'posetas

1. A Case of the S'posetas, 48.5 pts
2. Neil, In Accordance with Your Parent's Wishes, You May Step Out of the Pizzeria and Pray for Our Souls, 46 pts
2. Special Day? Oh, What Have I Forgotten Now? Now, Don't Panic. Is It Bacon Day? No, That's Crazy Talk! Neil's Getting Impatient. Take a Stab At It. "Happy 3rd Anniversary, Woo-Hoo! Simpsons Trivia!", 46 pts
4. Did You See That Movie Where They Send a Nuclear Submarine to Fight the Piranhas and One of Them Swims Right Down the Periscope and Bites Neil in the Eye and He Goes "Ah, Ah, Ah!" and the Old Lady Told Him It Would Happen?, 45 pts
4. This Team'll See To It That Neil Arsenty Doesn't Get Apricot One, 45 pts
4. We Got a Team, It's Called Whippin' Cupcakes, 45 pts
7. Okay, He Can Join Our Team, But I Get to Treat Him Like Garbage!, 44.5 pts
8. FBI Light Opera Society, 44 pts
9. This Team Engaged in Sexual Intercourse with Your Spouse or Significant Other, 43.5 pts
10. Hey, Neil! Neil! Remember That Time We Got Loaded and Set Those Beavers Loose in That Pine Furniture Store?, 43 pts
11. We Watched "The Simpsons" in a Bar Last Night. The Sound Wasn't On, But I Think We Got the Jist of It, 42 pts
12. Look Out, Itchy! They're Irish!, 41.5 pts
13. These Hot Dogs Have Been Here for 3 Years, They Are Strictly Ornamental, 40.5 pts
14. Daddy's Chubby Little Secret, 40 pts
15. Kids, Tell Me When Neil Stops Scratching Himself... Kids? / We'll Tell You, Mom, 39.5 pts
15. On This Trivia Team, We Obey the Laws of Thermodynamics, 39.5 pts
17. Pizzeria Serio: Where Roving Gangs Aren't a BIG Problem Anymore, 37.5 pts
18. The Team That Surrendered West Point to the Hated British, 37 pts
18. Trump-Burns '16, 37 pts
20. Who Are We? The Wildcats! Who Are We Gonna Beat? The Wildcats!, 35.5 pts
21. American Breast Enthusiast, 35 pts
22. And Now, a Message From the Trivia Team by the Window: Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf!, 34.5 pts
23. The Major Players at the Sewing Store, 33.5 pts
24. Our Team Name Sounds So Made Up... I Mean, "Yom Kip Pur?", 33 pts
25. Springfield Bearded Brigade, 32.5 pts
26. The Popes of Chili Town, 31 pts
27. Our Team is Also Named Bort, 30 pts
28. Open Faced Club Sand Wedge, 29.5 pts
29. You Guys Are Pathetic! No Wonder Neil Arsenty Made Me Head Bee Guy!, 28.5 pts
29. Team Discovery Channel, 28.5 pts
31. And Now, a Message from the Church of Latter Day Saints, 27 pts
32. Can I Borrow a Feeling?, 26.5 pts
33. Up Yours, Children!, 25.5 pts
34. Pepito, the Biggest Cat in the Whole Wide World, 24 pts
35. Why'd I Have the Bowl, Bart? Why Did I Have the Bowl?, 23.5 pts
36. Santa's Little Helpers, 22.5 pts
37. A Black Day for Baseball, 21 pts
38. Chilli Willi, 19.5 pts
39. Union Rule 26: Every Team Must Win Team of the Week Regardless of Gross Incompetence, Obesity or Rank Odor, 19 pts
40. The Erotic Cakes, 14 pts
41. Nick Triviera, 12.5 pts
42. Free Trombopoli!, 12 pts
43. Lower Expectations, 11 pts

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

September 14, 2015 - Vancouver

Location: The Tiki Bar At The Waldorf
Episodes: Stark Raving Dad, Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badasssss Song, The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson
Categories: Books, Martin Prince
Winner: Shelbyville Sucks!

1. Shelbyville sucks! 45 pts
2. A mathematician, a different kind of mathematician, and a statistician
3. The team with the most improved odor 39.5 
4. I have this craaaaazy friend who thinks she's gonna beat us at trivia. Is she crazy? 37 
5. Son, when you participate in Simpsons trivia it's not whether you win or lose, it's how drunk you get 36 
6. Our team didn't burn down the school. It was the butterfly, we tell you! The butterfly. 34.5 
7. We shouldn't have stopped for that haircut 33 
8. Team after team of ugly, ugly children 32.5 pts
9. We're not gay, but we'll learn 32.5 
10. The Stampy and Pinchy show 32 
11. Damn wiener kids 31.5 
12. If this team's learned anything, it's that Simpsons trivia night is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead 31.5 
13. Gorilla's choice 30.5 
14. Cypress Hill feat. The London Symphony Orchestra 30 
15. NYPD Shoe 26 
16. Thrillho 25 
17. Team Discovery Channel 24.5 
18. The following teams are gay 24 
19. Pin Pals 21.5 pts
20. Lil' lightning 19 
21. Can I borrow a team name? 19 
22. Yes, we've been drinking gasoline….motherrr 18 
23. Up and at them! 18 
24. Twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom! 17 
25. Homer, ozzy and the straw 13.5 
26. Khlav Kalash 10.5 

Monday, September 14, 2015

September 3, 2015 - Brooklyn, NY

Location: Berry Park
Categories: Lionel Hutz; Vacations/Trips
Episodes: Homer the Vigilante, The Two Mrs. Nahassapeemipetilons, Separate Vocations
Winner: It was worth sneaking into Berry Park. That was some good corn

1. It was worth sneaking into Berry Park. That was some good corn, 49 points
2. I know neil has his problems, but compared to the Dans, he's judge freaking reinhold!, 47.5 points
3. So I said look Dans, your car was upside down when I got here, and as for your grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that, 47 points
4. They came to burgle berry park!, 46 points
5. But we already came up with a team name. It took seven hours but we did it. It's done, 45.5 points
6. The only foundation repair team in town, 43 points
7. The birthday boy or girl, 42.5 points
8. Here's You! (Unflattering drawings of Dan and Dan), 41.5 points
8. Masters of ceremonies, Mulhall and Ozzi, like to act tough but they also like to host simpsons trivia weaing control top pantyhose, 41.5 points
10. Skeleton Power, 41 points
10. GBM Seeking SOulmate, 41 points
12. Aurora Borealis at this time of year at this time of day localized entirely within this bar, 40.5 points
13. Hired Goons, 39 points
14. I am the lizard team!, 38 points
15. Manufacturers of Bort TM license plates, 37.5 points
16. Srgt Skinner and the Kill Bot Factory Veterans, 37 points
16. The Pin Pals, 37 points
16. Our team name is otto and we love to get blotto, 37 points
19. The dead white male bashing PC thugs, 36 points
20. The country fried rubes, 33.5 points
21. Attention Berry Park, your son Dan has been arrested. Attention Berry Park, we've also arrested your older balder fatter Dan, 32 points
22. Soon the Dans will be queens of summertime. Uh we mean Kings. Kings!, 31 points
23. Roger Corman's 1000 dollar movie, 30.5 points
24. Sweet Merciful Crap!, 29.5 points
25. Those Rowdy Members of Chug-a-Lug house, 29 points
26. I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer, 26.5 points
27. Little Johnny Live a Lot, 25.5 points
27. Halfback passes to center, back to the wing, back to center, center holds it. holds it! holds it!, 25.5 points
29. My team is also named Bort, 25 points
30. Stoner's Pot Palace, 24.5 points
30. Sportszilla and the Jabberjockies, 24.5 points
32. They stole, they slept, they were rude to the customers. Still, there go the best damn trivia hosts a bar ever had., 23.5 points
33. Dan your dumb as a mule and twice as ugly, 22.5 points
34. Dental Plan, 21.5 points
35. Fudd, 20 points
36. Hardcore Nudity!!!, 15.5 points
37. Hellfish bonanza, 11.5 points
37. Steamed Hams, 11.5 points

39. Not sure if diddly or ding dang doodly, 4 points

Saturday, September 12, 2015

September 4th, 2015 - Ottawa

Location: Grace O'Malley's
Theme Rounds: Moe, Numbers
Winners: Capital City Goofballs

1 Capital City Goofballs 35.0
2 Cesspool on the Potomac 34.0
3 Sax on the Beach 31.5
4 Dogs with bees in their mouths… 28.5
5 Are "poo" and "ass" taken? 28.0
5 Funk-dancing for Self-defense 28.0
6 Springfield Isotopes 26.5
7 One Team Seems to Really Love the Speedo Man 24.5
8 Up and Let's Go! 23.0
9 They Found Us on the Mensroom Floor 19.5
10 Can I Borrow a Feeling? 12.0
11 You Don't Win Trivia with Salad 6.0

September 10th, 2015 - Ottawa

Location: Hooley's
Episodes: Technical difficulties
Theme Rounds: Homer, Numbers
Winners: Team Canyonaro

1 Team Canyonaro 32.0
2 Trambompoline!!! 27.0
3 Funk-dancing For Self-defense 26.5
4 Cesspool on the Potomac 26.0
5 Three Bad Neighbours 25.5
6 Can I Borrow a Feeling? 25.0
7 Mighty Pigs, The 24.0
8 Stupid Lisa Garbage Face 21.0
9 She's the Fastest 20.5
9 We No Function Beer Well Without 20.5
10 Eat up Martha 18.5
10 Press Any Key 18.5
11 Lenny and the Jets 12.0
12 Shelbyville Lemontrees 4.0

September 8th, 2015 - Toronto

Location: Cadillac Lounge
Episodes: Bart Carny, A Star is Burns, The PTA Disbands!!
Theme Rounds: Groundskeeper Willie, It Happened at Springfield Elementary
Winners: Look Behind You, Chris! The Sun is Exploding Again!

1. Look Behind You, Chris! The Sun is Exploding Again! 45 pts
2. Sex Cauldron  44.5 pts
3. Can't Talk. Coming Down.  44 pts
3. Our Team is Hatless. I Repeat, Hatless!  44 pts
5. Our Team Did the Deed With Chris, Matt, and Andrew. But We're Going to Have to Go With Matt, Because He Liked Makin' Bacon on the Beach  43 pts
5. The Wildcats! (The Real Ones)  43 pts
7. Ayatollah Razmara and his Cadre of Fanatics  42.5 pts
7. Our Team's Dreams All Involve Combing Our Hair  42.5 pts
9. Dumb as a Mule and Twice as Ugly  41.5 pts
10. Hopping Mad Collection Agency  41 pts
11. Tis a Fine Barn, But Tis Sure No Team, English  40.5 pts
12. The Unmistakeable Cone of Ignorance  39 pts
13. The Team That Never Ruins Their Fun by Giving Into Their Throbbing Biological Urges  38.5 pts
14. This Team Smells Like Beer and Pretzeled Bread  38 pts
15. R, Q, J, ?, :)  37.5 pts
16. Goodtime Slim, Uncle Doobie, and the Great Frisco Freakout  36.5 pts
16. Zuff! Pan! Snuff! Bort! Pooo! Newt! Mint! Zak!  36.5 pts
18. Disparaging the Boot is a Bootable Offense  36 pts
19. Armin's Copy of Swank  35 pts
19. The Inanimate Carbon Rods  35 pts
21. My Team's a Box, Damn You! A Box!!!!  32.5 pts
21. Wait! I'm OK This Month! My Mom Bought Me Deodorant!  32.5 pts
23. Is It About My Cube?  31.5 pts
23. The Cruddlers 31.5 pts
25.  I Can't Believe It's a Trivia Team… Also Expert Shoe Repair  30.5 pts
26. Chairman Moe's Magic Wok  30 pts
26. Globex  30 pts
26. Hello, Chief! Let's Talk, Why Not?  30 pts
29. Just Because I Don't Care Doesn't Mean I Don't Understand  28.5 pts
30. Stealing Our Answers? That's a Paddlin'.  27 pts
31. Our Team Name is Agnes! It Means Lamb! Lamb of God!  26.5 pts
32. Trab Pu Kcip  26 pts
33. 40 Rods to the Hog's Head  24 pts
33. Don't Look Up My Answers Unless You Mean It  24 pts
35. You'll Have to Speak Up; We're Wearing Towels 17.5 pts
36. Ugly and Hate Filled  11.5 pts
37. Principal Kahoutek and That Little Boy of His  11pts
38. Blood and Guts Murphy  7 pts